How to Buy and Resell a Puppy on Craigslist

dog

So… you bought a puppy on Craigslist only to find out that it’s not what you wanted for your life, after all. It happens to many people out there. People bring the dog home and then discover that dogs poop and pee. Once the dog poops or pisses on the carpet, it’s time for the dog to find a new home.

peeing dog

Now, it’s time to place an ad on Craigslist to find a new home for the puppy that you purchased… from Craigslist. You won’t be able to recoup your entire investment, but if you calculate the amount of puppy love you received, you’ll see, at least psychologically, that you are breaking even.

Your Craigslist ad should say:

Amazing little puppy, Great Dane/ Pit Bull mix without papers. I love this dog so much, and we go to the beach together, he sleeps in my lap in the evening while I watch Netflix. You’ll love him and I want him to find a great family with a yard. My studio apartment of 100 square feet isn’t enough room for him. He’s a restricted breed, but not terribly vicious at all. No small children. I want a great family for him so there will be a rehoming fee of $750.

Some nitwit will answer your ad and save you from yourself. They’ll ask if the dog has had shots. Say yes because you actually just did two jello shots loaded with vodka the other night, and the dog licked your cup afterwards.

Once the dog is sold, you may feel immense sorrow tinged with guilt. This is normal. You can erase your sorrow and guilt by searching for a new dog on Craigslist. Additionally you should take the initiative to place your own ad on Craigslist explaining to people in the area that you’re looking to purchase a Great Dane /Pit Bull mix because you miss your old friend.

 

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